"Was it just a dream?"

a few things was on my mind past few days.

1.how the road could be so rough.
i finally knew how rough the road could be when God didnt carry me.
i realise this on my way to a place where its flat so i could blade again. {scared of slopes!}
i was walking barefooted and i was thinking real deep. {thats cos, the rest bladed ahead.}
the past few years, i have been walking that kind of road. so rough, so painful.
it was never ever smooth once. maybe a few times.
but come to think about it, when was the last time i walked on a smooth road?
i couldnt even remember. mostly they were rough and painful roads.
through rough times, i didnt even ask God to carry me. thats why it was painful.
now, to think about all these, makes me realise that i neglected Him alot, ALOT. ):

2. life on wheels.
blading that day was getting me all nervous when it comes to the slopes.
falling down on my butt was one dangerous thing that could happen to me.
i am different, my life is different too. my tailbone is sticking out. {SCARY HUR?}
my life was almost in danger everyday, everywhere, every minute and second.
once i am not carefull, fall on that fragile bone, there goes my life. RUINED!
paralyzed waist down. my whole life will be on wheels. FOREVER!
now, i could used that word. thats cos it will be permenant.
though i would be afraid to face the future ahead, if life is meant to be, i cant deny it.
like what i said, "What lies ahead, it happens for some reason."

3. YOU
every morning, i find myself thinking of you all over again. WHY HAR?!
sometimes i dont, sometimes i do. but this, i just cant help it!
every morning, i just had to find a way to move on. but?! ):

now we hardly even talk! ):
you said you wanted to talk to me, but you dont talk to me at all.
maybe nothing to talk about? i have to keep think of all the maybe's just to not think about it.
thats the thing i do every morning, thinking of all the maybe's.

Alright then. Sigh. Dun let this affect your writing k? It just hurts to read some things on your blog. Its as if i am the bad guy. Which i probably am? Sigh.

-sms you sent

after reading this msg, it really hit me real hard. HARD!!!
i didnt realise, i have been writing things that will hurt you.
but can you at least tell me which post? so i will know, what i actually wrote.
but i didnt to it intentionally. i think i was a little ticked off and i start writing all those.

maybe its time to change my way of writing and putting myself into other people's position.
i just dont wish to hurt you even further. SO SORRY. ):

but again, no lying. iLy. still.
-----

i got burned by the cigarette lighter from the car.
not serious but painful! ):
THANKS TO MY SMARTY BROTHER! lol.
it was painful when i felt the heat!
brother doesnt even know that. and he continue playing with it.
i could see the bubbles! eeek!