i finally knew everything.
all i could do was to blame myself for everything.
i just wish all this had never ever happen at all.
but what could i do.
i cant stop it from happening.
cant change the time. to the past.

he wrote everything down. so i had no choice but to face the truth. yeah yeah yeah. i didnt know anything. this what i call DUMB! cos i dont know anything. okay. fine. i didnt know anything. be that way. i dont know anything okay? whatever. just wondering why does he always have to say all those stuff. ask me questions like "do you or not?" when he said he did. does he even trust me? maybe just saying it for the sake of saying. YES! i agree with YOU! that i hurt you. but by saying those words and asking those questions dont you think it will hurt too? makes me think that you dont trust me. makes me think that you are just saying it for the sake of saying it. makes me think that you are pretending. just say the truth la. since you say i have hurt you. you could hurt me back right? so now i am letting you hurt me back. so take that chance la. holding it back wouldnt help right? you could hurt me all you want. i might take it seriously or i might not. who would care? practically no one. those scars that had been in my heart when you first hurt me. till now. still there. wishing that it would be healed. but will it heal? i know i hurt you real badly. but i dont know what i did that for. sigh. life is not going get any better.

lifejustSUCK!
now you could hurt me all you want.
i wouldnt mind.

life is going to be worse than ever!

`pureSTUPIDITY! serously! sigh!

now i know how much i hurt him

{cries herself to sleep}